My beautiful baby girl and I, the night she was born sleeping
Even though it was the saddest moment of my life, I couldn't help but smile when I looked at her. She was so beautiful - just what I'd always wanted! A little bundle of perfection and she was all mine (and Dan's!). She didn't need to see me crying, I wanted her to feel happiness around her not feel tears. Yes, I know she was already gone, but she still needed hugs and joy. How could I not look at her wonderful face and smile through the pain?
I wish I had more photos of me holding her, but the ones I have are perfect nonetheless. Some other self-portraits since this moment are:
In France, after getting out of hospital but before Isla's funeral - smiling through the pain but usually breaking down shortly after
Bought a new car on a whim - this colour/make but a brand new one! How tiny and impractical could I go?!
Me and my daughter in her beautiful resting place
With my Aching Arms bear at the Angel of the North
At a friend's wedding just this weekend