Visited Isla's grave today.....

....... And it definitely needs something to 'mark' it. Someone is moving in next door and she looks so tiny compared to the space they are going to take up. Look how tiny she is!

So I made a little butterfly shape out of stones - kept me occupied for a few minutes anyway!

The note I wrote the other day had blown away so I'll find a way to put it up there more permanently, but have ordered a couple of little bits to mark her spot in the mean time. I'll put pics of them up when they come. 

Had a funny day today. Had a cry at Isla's grave - find myself apologising to her lots. 

Apologising for not remembering to stop for flowers on the way out!
Apologising for letting her die. 
Apologising that she was dying inside me for 2 weeks and I didn't know.
Apologising that she suffered. 
Apologising that she'll never get to grow up.
Apologising that she'll never get cuddled by mummy or daddy again. 

But I mostly tell her I love her and miss her.

So much it hurts.